Holding Onto the Positives

Sometimes life throws you a curve ball or two and it can be difficult to see through to the positives.

It is how you deal with those curve balls that shape who you are, who you become right?

As a family we have had a huge amount to deal with in the last year.  Redundancy, illness, relocating, illness, new job, losing job, illness, debt, more debt, illness, losing our home.  And so it continues.

The biggest by far has been losing our lovely home, becoming unable to afford the rent.  The wonderful worst thing about depression for me is how completely self-involved I became.  I took the approach of an Ostrich, that is I buried my head in the sand when things got just a little bit sticky, until they got so sticky there was no way out, all the while my husband believed I was coping.  Since he was out of the house from 8am (before that I am a grump anyway) until 11pm (when I once again become a grump) there was no reason for him to think that I wasn’t managing.

So we end up in the situation we are in.  No home to call our own, in temporary accommodation with a mere £165 a fortnight coming in until I can complete the 100-odd pages of forms I have to fill out (and then of course DWP make an assessment).

And yet, we are lucky.  I am lucky.

My husband and I got to put our son to bed last night, we woke up with him having clambered into our bed.  Yes, we may all be sleeping in the same room, which is also our living space but we are all alive and healthy. There are some 20 families in Connecticut that were not so lucky last night.  Who woke up this morning to the first day of the rest of their lives without one of their children.

There are families in this country who are living in terrible conditions.  In a so-called rich and developed country this shouldn’t be happening.

I may well have a huge array of neurological conditions which will require several operations just to halt the progress and yes I may well never be fully fit but I still get to play with my son to some degree and have just as much chance as the average person to see him grow up.  Some parents aren’t that lucky, whether through illness, fighting for our country, whatever.

So, this Christmas I am focussing on what I have already, rather than any material objects I won’t be getting.

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

We have a roof over our heads, however cramped it is at least clean and safe for my child.  I have a son and husband who love me.  An extended family who do all they can to help us emotionally and financially.  And all of you.  My blog readers and twitter pals who, for the last year, have been more supportive than I can ever put into words.

So, in order to keep what is left of my sanity I am taking a fresh approach.  I am forcing myself to focus on the positives, hold my son a bit more, take him to the park when I am physically able to, read and sing to him when I cannot venture out, be thankful for my amazing family.  I know this won’t work every day, depression is a bitch like that but I shall do my damnest.

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5 thoughts on “Holding Onto the Positives

  1. an attitude like that will carry you miles - keep going! I try to live my life like that (although I am so fortunate not to have much to complain about). I'm now trying to instil the attitude into my kids by reading "did I ever tell you how lucky you are" by dr seuss, my new favourite kids book. I count myself lucky every day that I am not "Herbie Hart who has taken his thromdibulator apart"
    Knitty Mummy recently posted..The "I made it up as I went along no-sew" JumperMy Profile

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    1. MummyGlitzer

      Thank you for reading and commenting.. I honestly think if I don't try and be positive then I will never get better. And I do have plenty to be positive about when you think about it. Xx

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  2. Kara Guppy

    Oh,lovely I am so sorry. I thought you were moving in with your sister!
    Temporary accommodation is crap and I hated every minute of being in mine (many moons ago). Hopefully it will be the start of something better, the council will have to re-home you and at least it will be yours!
    Good luck with the mountainous paperwork, you have my sympathy and if I can help in any way - please shout xx

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  3. Your bravery, positive attitude, and sheer grit and guts combine into a great inspiration. This post should be a wake-up call to everyone reading it. As I learned about several others who had faced various traumas, I started a blog with this: http://fireflyphil.wordpress.com/2011/04/14/an-opening-shot/
    Over twenty months later, it rings truer than ever. I wish you and yours every success in getting 'on your feet' again.
    Firefly Phil recently posted..Yet to Come?My Profile

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  4. This is such a beautiful and heartbreaking post. I can identify with a lot of it from the things that happened to us in 2012. You have buckets of emotional strength in there. Try to remember that and dig it out when you are feeling low. You can fight this depression and your optimistic outlook can and will win through. Just take one day at a time. Big hugs. Xxx
    Emma @crazywithtwins recently posted..Today I’m having a HemithyroidectomyMy Profile

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