Mixtape Monday

*Warning* This may be an overly soppy edition of Mixtape Monday for some.

Five months, three months. Neither seem like a long time yet both can feel like an eternity.

Five months ago, I thought my world was going to fall apart. The husband and I semi-seperated in that he slept on the sofa and we kept ourselves to ourselves, leading independent lives, as much as is possible when still living together, only talking to discuss arrangements with Harry. If we had the money, or friends locally he would have moved out. Neither of us wore our wedding rings for the duration, we saved whatever small amount of money we could (to fund him moving out) and this all went on for almost four weeks before we were finally in a place where we could talk without feelings of anger and hurt surfacing in an overly volatile way.

Three months ago and we found ourselves in a situation which made us realise that if we didn't make certain changes, our little family would end as we know it. With a lot of love and support we made those changes and we have never been closer. We are enjoying life as a family more, growing in more love than I thought possible.

None of us can look into the future, we can only hope to learn from the past and take each day as it comes. We can hope that we continue to create a loving, safe and secure environment for Harry and ourselves but who knows what tomorrow will bring?

The thing is, the husband and I have been through so much. Homelessness, allegations of varying degrees, health problems, depression, all sorts and yet these two things earlier in the year are the only ones that made us wonder if we could make it, nothing has tested us or our love for each other in quite the same way. Yet somehow, we undoubtedly knew we did still love each other, very much. Perhaps the toll and stress of the last couple of years finally caught up with us?

During these times, I did what I often do and listened to music. Music that allowed me to cry, music that reminded me of happier times, music that allowed me to hope. One such song was this.

Clara Unravelled

9 thoughts on “Mixtape Monday

  1. I haven't visited your blog in a while but the mix tape heading caught my eye - I used to join in many moons ago! Sorry to hear about your recent sadness and totally get the song. Music is so crucial at these times. Hope it all looks up for you soon. X x
    76sunflowers recently posted..365 #24 {Signs of Summer}My Profile

  2. This is a beautiful post and a very beautiful song.
    So happy you and D are on the mend and going from strength to strength. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger xxx
    Emily recently posted..Juneaton day 12-15My Profile

  3. I adore this song. The original is by The Waterboys and that's been a favourite of mine for a long time. I must say it really suits Ellie Goulding's voice though, it's beautiful.
    I'm sorry you've been having such a hard time, but glad you have found your way through it xxx
    Pippa Ainsworth recently posted..I'm wearing Kaliko to Britmums LiveMy Profile

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  5. I only talked and blogged about it after the fact, but me and the Mr went through a rough patch last year. It nearly ended us, but didn't. We ended up as strong as ever, leaving me knowing that even the toughest times are survivable. Our song is Pink/Just give me a reason.......... it just fits x
    Ojo Henley recently posted..On My SideMy Profile


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